Reflection by Christina Aguilera & Song Birds of Pain by Garry Kilworth
The Songbirds of Pain by Garry Kilworth and Reflection by Christina Aguilera shares the same theme of “finding one’s self (identity)”, the subject of both the selection and the song has been expected to act in ways which are opposite or afar from their true personalities. The Songbirds of Pain is about a woman who has her identity created for her, while Reflection is about a girl who was hiding who she was in order to reach the expectations of the people surrounding her. I have related some of the song’s stanzas to the event or occurrences that happened to Anita in the Songbirds of Pain.
In the song Reflection on the first 4 lines “Look at me, you may think you see who I really am, but you’ll never know me. ” I have related these lines in Songbirds of Pain because Anita (the protagonist) has had her identity created for her by Philip. Philip, Anita’s lover, has molded her to be someone who he wants to be with. He did not really know Anita from who she really is because (1) Anita was young when he met her and she has not found herself yet, and (2) he chooses to see what he wants to see and not what things really are.
Anita did not complain about this, she did not mind that her opinions were just barrowed from Philip but then she had come to realize that one day Philip would leave her, and she would not have anything, except her beauty. But beauty fades away with youth, and she is growing older so she have decided to have an operation that will make her more beautiful and that will make her beauty last longer. In the third stanza “I am now, in a world where I have to hide my heart and what I believe in. But somehow I will show the world what’s inside my heart and be loved for who I am”.
Anita has this identity where she cannot show what she really feels and thinks. I think that Anita wanted an operation not just because she wanted everlasting beauty but because she wanted to finally show who she really is, I think she want to know what will happen if things in her life happened differently. Like what if, before Philip found her, she has already found herself? I think that she wants to use this opportunity to find out if Philip would still love her or if things would be the same as it was. In the sixth stanza “There’s a heart that must be free to fly that burns with a need to know the reason why”.
I think that when Anita was at Algarez, Brazil for her operation she felt free, because for the first time she has finally made a decision for herself. Even though she had second thoughts about the operation she still pushed it through, because I think that Anita felt that she needs to do this for herself and for her own good, and I think that she is testing herself if she could make the right choices for herself or choices that will make her feel satisfied and happy. In the last stanza “Why must we all conceal what we think and how we feel? Must there be a secret me I’m forced to hide?
I won’t pretend that I’m someone else for all time. When will my reflection show who I am inside? When will my reflection show who I am inside? ” In the end Anita found herself, her world and she used pain (due to the operations) to get there. Secretly she loved that world, because she was herself, she did not have to act in ways that other people (Philip) expects her to be. She hid her love for pain, I do not think that she was proud of it, but she was able to fake just enough to go back to London. Philip was waiting for Anita at the Airport; he was waiting for Anita to arrive.
When Anita saw Philip she felt how much she loves him, and what pain she will experience if she loses him. Pain, Anita has learned to love pain, and Anita was leaving Philip for the pain that it will cost her. She will be in pain, but at the same time she would be herself, forever. She would be in the world of Anita where “She was the sun, the moon, the stars, the Earth. She was void, she was matter, she was light. ” She is going to be the center of her own universe. Anita has been a naive girl from the start of the selection but her character evolved after a series of occurrences that have been life changing for her.
She managed to found herself even though it took her a long time. Like in the song Reflection, the subject was able to justify that she wants to be seen and to break free from the status quo that is holding her. The moral of this is; you should show who you really are and do not think that it’s too late because as the saying goes “it’s better late than never”. And do not expect that the path would not be rocky because it is always hard to get something that is worthwhile. We just have to be patient.
